I have made many decisions lately. I feel so free and at peace despite fact I am entering one of the busiest times of my life: PhD submission.
The firm decisions have been made recently but they have been brewing for a while. I’ve been mulling them over…ruminating on them… it’s been months of storming and rebellion. Of experiment and discovery. It’s felt a bit like when you are a teenager and you go through that process of working out who you are, where you stand on various issues, what you stand for, who you need to stand up to etc.
After this period of thinking and experimenting and discovering (and a bloody long semester of hard work on my PhD and teaching plus my other commitments & passions), I took the first ever 2 week break with no plans other than to get on a plan, check into a super deluxe fab resort on Phuket and just let whatever happens, happen. Lots happened – so much fun, so relaxing, so uplifting. It was just what the doctor ordered and awesome for so many reasons. I really felt I deserved it and lapped up every moment without guilt. Rare for a PhD student or someone with the personality traits I possess! :)
I had time to reflect. I had time to rest and rejuvenate. I had time to take in all the ground I have covered in the last 2 years. The holiday was my prize for winning 1st Place in the Michelle Bridges 12 Week Body Transformation (12WBT) program in December 2010. Took us 18 months to lock in a travel date, but we go there. It was ever present in my mind how we’d come to be in Phuket and all that I had achieved and overcome in that time. You can read about my story in this blog and check out a short story about my transformation on Mish’s 12WBT website.
I also had time to think about what my future could look like, what it *would* look like. I had time to dream and get a clearer picture of how I can bring my passions together and live a life I never dared dream before!
I came back ready to tackle the next challenges…. and had some surprising challenges greet me in my first week back. Game changers… but I am nothing if not flexible and adaptable these days. Instead of crumbling I worked harder to get my mindset right, I spent time with some of the amazing people in my life who helped me find my ‘flow’ and get ‘in the zone’. This happened through training with the Zenergy team, chatting with Emma (aka Emazon), through seeing the physio and masseuse, through some incredible work colleagues and of course my partner, parents and closest family and friends. It’s been a big 4 weeks.
This has all been building up to ‘crunch time’ in many ways in my life; in multiple areas of my life. Time to finish some things. Time to call it quits to others. Time to make some decisions and take a stand.
Endings and beginnings.
I’ve been increasingly ‘in the zone’ or experiencing that ‘flow’ for a few weeks now. More to come on that – I find it fascinating. At a time when I am under more pressure than I’ve experienced for a long time I am more relaxed and more productive than I could have dreamt possible!
Also decisions – tough & scary decisions – are coming to me easily.
It can be as easy as waking up and deciding. True story.